Create or marry a preexisting AB on both characters, you only get access to APQ which doesn't have to be done with your spouse, only requirement is a party full of "married" people.
AB is a character you should already have anyway for the link skill. As for the issue of two same sex couples marrying in-game I'll say the same thing I say every time, stop making it a political issue, the best solution for this is to remove gender entirely from the game if it's not going to do anything except limit you from a handful of items anyway.